Tuesday, August 4, 2009

Dog Humor

It's been a while while since I posted any dog humor. So I guess it is time now.

What kind of dog can use the phone?
A Dail-Matian

What kind of dog would you find in a cave?
a Bat Terrier

Which dog is very obedient?
a Sit Bull Terrier

What do you get when you cross a small dog and a large boat?
a Ship Tzu

What did the hungry Dalmatian say after his meal?
"That hit the spots!"

Why are Dalmatians no good at "Hide and Seek"?
They're always spotted!

What dog will laugh at any joke?
A chi-ha-ha

Where do the dogs go for the Macey's Thanksgiving parade?
New Yorkie


Genuine misprints taken from real publications

FREE PUPPIES: part German Shepherd - part dog .
FREE PUPPIES: ½ Cocker Spaniel - ½ sneaky neighbor dog.
FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER, 8 years old. Unpleasant little dog.
GERMAN SHEPHERD, 85 lb., neutered, speaks German, free.
FOUND: dirty white dog, looks like a rat, been out awhile, better be a reward.
CUTE KITTEN FOR SALE, 2 Cents or best offer
FREE: Farm kittens, ready to eat.
KITTENS 8 WEEKS OLD - seeking good Christian home.


Dog Law

In Columbus Georgia , it is against the law for dogs to howl after 9 P.M.
Berea Kentucky law requires dogs on the streets after dark to display a red taillight.
Florida law does not allow dogs to ride in a school bus.
A law in Zion Illinois prohibits owners from teaching their dogs to smoke cigars.
In Fox Point Wisconsin, dogs cannot travel in groups larger than two.
The Belvedere California City Council passed a law that reads, "No dog shall be in a public place without its master on a leash."
Dog Proverbs

"There is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face."- Ben Williams
"Whoever said you cannot buy happiness forgot about little puppies."- Gene Hill
"Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail."- Unknown
"No one appreciates the very special genius of your conversation as your dog does."- Christopher Morley
"A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself."- Josh Billings
"I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts."- John Steinbeck
"Say something idiotic and nobody but a dog politely wags his tail."- Virginia Graham
"All knowledge, the totality of all questions and answers, is contained in the dog."- Franz Kafka

1 comment:

BCxFour said...

"Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail."- Unknown