Slowly feeling better

Today I woke up and felt great. Jeff got up early and let Tess and Nan out to go potty. When they came in, Tess decided her night shift was over and went to the office; Nan took up the slack and lay next to me on the floor keeping me company. Every time I move she would stick her nose on my body and either nudge or lick me. She has stepped up to the plate quite well and takes her job seriously.

Then my mom arrived and again, Tess and Nan abandoned me. They bolted to the door, barked and circled my mom, tails wagging and bouncing up and down. They know her arrival time and eagerly wait each day. They will be in for a big surprise since tomorrow will be her last visit for a while.

And of course, mom fed them their biscuit and fussed all over them. For the rest of the day, she had two sets of piercing eyes fastened upon her. Mom made me breakfast and after we ate, Tess and Nan got some leftovers. Nan has learned to sit nicely and gently eat off my mom’s hand. She has also learned if she *talks* to mom, them mom will fuss over her.

My appetite was quite good as I ate two Japanese pancakes and a fruit bowl. I can breathe without effort and my energy level is much higher. I feel much, much better and it shows.

Janet came by to work Tess and help with chores. I walked down to the barn with her and gave her some lesson tips. Tess and Nan sat in front of the gate as they knew sheep work was involved. Nan was sadly disappointed when Janet took Tess through the gate. Nan sat and looked at me so I called her over and gave her some bread and fussed over her.

I took a 12 minute walk and checked on the critter. Mr. McGoo is doing well and was walking on his two legs; prior he was dragging on leg. He looked like his wounds were all healed up. I gave him and the chickens some bread. It’s good to be able to able to do some sort of feeding.

I got back to the house and still felt good. I wasn’t tired as before so I fiddled about in the kitchen with my mom. I made coffee and did some little chores. It was nice to even be able to do a little something than be helpless.

Janet came up and asked if she could work Scott. Scott was more than happy to work for her and did well. She then took all the dogs and played ball with them. Sleat, Kuro, Scott, Tess and Nan were so happy to play ball and had a fun time. I watched from the living room window, Kuro has grown up quite a bit and is going to be a nice sized dog. He is all legs and is very in tune with people.

I cut my pain meds in half for the day and I felt it. My chest had a dull pain at the top, enough to make me feel it. So I took a ½ perco in hopes that it would help. It helped ease the pain but not totally. I am going to have to readjust my pain meds as the Doctor wants me to reduce them. I’ll be happy when I can really reduce my pain meds. I have to go back to work in three weeks and I sure hope that I will be well enough for that.

Mom made salmon with a shallot glaze topping. Plus steamed potatoes and carrots and fresh corn. It was very tasty and I ate most of it. I don’t think my mom have ever made a bad meal. I didn’t finish the corn so mom gave that to Tess and Nan. She also gave her salmon skin to them. They have the game plan all figured out. During the meal, sit in front and be quiet and after the meal, sit mice in the kitchen and they will get the leftovers. They are on their best behavior with my mom.

After lunch, mom went to find Rigby in the barn. Tess and Nan went with her. Mom fed Rigby, Tess, Nan and Kodi some canned food. Kodi greets my mom when she shows up in the morning and she fusses over him. Kodi was delighted to get some canned food. Mom is developing a fan club here.

Mom left and then I took a nap. Partway through the nap, I woke up. I must have rolled on my chest incorrectly and it hurt enough to wake me up. I lay on my back for a bit to ease the pain and it slowly went away. I think since I cut my long term pain meds in half, I’ll have to take ½ perco to tide me over so I don’t get the hurting chest pain. That pain really woke me up.

Jeff and I had dinner and I ate (almost) a normal sized meal. It was very hot and I think my appetite was affected from it. I am going to drink an Ensure for some calories and then my nightly milkshake. Pretty soon I will just as plump as Tess. I did weigh myself today and I am 111 lbs, a gain of two pounds from yesterday.

We are bummed that I still have a hole in my heart. Some how that happened after the surgery and there is no reason why. I am not looking forward to another operation but at least it is not as critical as the one I just had. The huge hole that I had is mostly sealed and I will be better and the main thing is that I am still alive. With the 2.8 ratio, I was in danger of a clot or stroke (high candidate) and now I am not in danger. There are people who have the 1.7 ratio who are fine and do not opt for surgery.

I am hoping with the lung tap they did yesterday and the prednisone that this will speed up my recovery. Eating several normal sized meals will no doubt help. I keep a daily log of my walks, meals, Blood pressure, heart rate and so forth. This gives me an idea of my good and bad days. Now, I hope the future entries will be all good days!!

Thanks to everyone who posts comments on the blog, emails or phone calls. I love getting trial updates. Today I got a trial update from Donna. It was so sweet that it brought tears to my eyes. Thank you Donna and Kate for making my day!!

The Dr visit and lung tap

August 14, 2008

Mom arrived at 10:00 a.m. Tess and Nan were outside and when mom pulled up they ran to her car. Tess put her paws on mom’s car door and barked and whined. She just goes crazy when mom shows up. Rigby then climbed on top of her car for his share of attention. Mom has her fan club of Tess, Nan and Rigby. She isn’t much of a dog person but she loves Tess and Nan. And of course, Rigby.

By the time my mom opened her car door; Tess had gotten her jolly-ball and was ready for her when she got out. So mom tossed the ball for Tess and Nan. I could hear them barking and mom praising them. They all had fun and soon they all came into the house. Tess and Nan were winded and went to the office. She fed Rigby his morning cat food and Rigby ate every bit up. He loves mom also.

Nelson showed up when mom was tossing the ball. Nan loves Nelson as she is number ONE in his eyes. He walks on water in her eyes!!

Today I went to Dr Austin for a follow up. My mom and brother, Nelson took me to the hospital. I knew that I had fluid in my lungs since I had talked to Dr Condon the day before. He set an appointment up with a pulmonary (?) Doctor to do a lung tap. We also talked about my progress and I am not gaining the weight that I should have. So even though I have been eating lots, the food that I have been eating is not high enough in calories. So I have to eat food that has more calories. My fruit plates are not cutting it, I also need to make sure when I do my walks that I do not stop during the walk to take a break.

I talked to Dr Austin about the leaking in my heart. When they did the heart operation they did an echo and there was no leakage. Since then, a leak has occurred. That was unexpected as they it should have not leaked. The leak is rated at 1.7. What is probably going to happen is in the fall, after I heal, is another operation. That operation is the one they run a tube up from my groin area and put a *clam clamp* over the hole. I am not to sure what the technical name is but it covers the hole like a clamp. That is not a major operation like the one I just had. He wants me to wait until I am completely healed. So needless to say, today was a bummer day at the hospital. I have to have another operation and I have fluid in my lungs. On the bright side, the water is out of my lung and I just need to heal and then have another operation. Dr. Austin does not do this type of operation but Swedish Hospital does. It’s a long journey for me but it’s a journey that I must travel.

So Dr Austin made an appt with the Dr. Freudenberger, otherwise known as Todd. I made a feeble attempt at trying to pronounce his last name and he must have felt sorry for me so told me that I could call him Todd. He is very nice and made me feel at ease. He is the partner of Dr. Watts who did the first lung tap. I really enjoyed Dr Watts as he was funny and made me feel at ease. Those pulmonary Doctor must have to pass a test which requires them to have a good sense of humor and be funny as well as being nice guys.

I remember how much the first tap hurt so I was not looking forward to a second. It needed to be done as I was short of breath and had a hard time doing the Air Puffer. It’s right up there with pulling the wisdom teeth.

Anyways to help me keep my mind off the procedures, Todd and I chatted about life, family and work. He numbed my back area with a local and he then was able to do the tap. He talked me through the procedure and drew out 800 ml of bloody fluid. It only hurt towards the end when my lung started to expand again. My right lung was full of fluid so that was not good. He got done quickly and it didn’t hurt as much as the first tap. He did a great job and I felt much better. Then he did a chest x-ray for a baseline. I go back in 2 week to both Dr Austin and Todd.

After he was done, my mom, Nelson and I needed to fill my prescription of prednisone. That is a steroid that should help from fluid building up in my lungs again. I hope it will work as I do not look forward to another tap.

We left around 11:00 a.m. in the morning and got home close to 4:00 p.m. In that time we had two Dr appointment, a lung tap and x-rays. On the way home, we stopped for burgers and I managed to eat a whole cheeseburger. At the end, I started to fade so Nelson talked me into finishing the last few bites.

We got home and I was tired so I lay down for a bit. I tried to take a nap but couldn’t fall asleep. However just laying down for a couple hours helped me. What I did notice that was different is that this time, I was not exhausted or weak. The last few visits I would just collapse and sleep. This time I was tired but not exhausted and got up in a couple of hours. The other times, I slept through the rest of the day. So by comparing this visit to the other visits, I am doing much better.

We did a quick walk through the barn when we got home and the hay that I had sold was picked up. That’s good as it was blocking a stall. Nelson gave fresh water to the sheep and alfalfa to the cow and horse. Mr. McGoo is healing quite well. He is not lame and is eager for food. He feels safe in the duck coop and stays on it during the day.

Mom and Nelson left after making sure I was ok. Apparently they hit bad traffic going home and it took them longer than normal. I appreciate them coming over and taking care of me.

Did I mention that Tess shared the couch with me when I was lying on the couch? By now, you should know that!! She even put her head on a pillow.

Mom made some homemade spaghetti for Jeff and I for dinner. Jeff had to make the noodles and cook a sausage to add to the sauce. Normally, I would be able to pick at my dinner and finally after a bit, eat it. However in this case, I wolfed it down Tess was not happy that I polished off my bowl and had no leftovers for her. I will give her a biscuit instead. So far, today I had two normal sized meals. This is very key. If I keep eating these type of meals and my milkshake and a can of ensure a day, I should be able to put on weight. I am tired of looking like a scarecrow. Tess doesn’t look like a scarecrow but a roly poly bear. Well, not too roly poly, but well fed.

Some setback news

I had a sleeping pill last night and it helped me quite a bit. I slept good and hard. I woke up to Jeff sitting next to me and it was good to wake up and see him. He got me set up for the day with my food and pills. Right after he left, my mom showed up. Tess and Nan couldn’t dance enough around her when she walked through the door. They even barked with excitement.

I felt much better today and was alert and able to visit with my mom. I had fruit for breakfast and then rice balls and more fruit. I ate quite a bit and had a good appetite. My mom was very concerned since the day before I was not doing well and last night when I talked to her on the phone, I sounded horrible. I felt horrible when I talked to her.

Mom and I went for a walk today down to the barn. She feed a bunch of bread to the sheep and cow. They all came running up to her and she enjoys feeding them. I got to feed only a couple of loaves. I feed them to the geese and some sheep. It was nice to be able to walk about and not feel weak.

I talked to my Cardiologist today about the chest x-ray results. I’ve had a hard time breathing into the Air Puffer for my goal of 1500. I usually can do about 1000-1100. The results from the x-ray showed that I had fluid in my right lung and it was about 500-1000 ml. They will have to do a tap more than likely. I can’t do any deep breathes since it hurts. I remember when I had the tap at the hospital that drew about 1L of blood from each lung. After they did the tap, I felt much better. It hurt when they did the tap last time so I expect if they do a tap, it will hurt again.

In addition, my right and left atrium still have a leak. The ratio is 1.7. They had hoped it would be completely sealed but it is not. That is a real setback for me. When I first went in, the ratio was 2.8. Anyone with the ratio above 1.8 (?) will have surgery to fix the hole. Now, I am under the 1.8 ratio but not much. I asked my Dr if they will do surgery to fix the hole and they will not do it since it is 1.7

Tomorrow I will ask Dr. Austin if the patch will seal over time or if what I have now (1.7) is what I have to live with. I just don’t know.

I had some visitors today. Joan and Deborah whom I have know for many years. It was good to see them. That perked up my day. I am glad they came by this week than last week. I have known them for over 25 years. It’s amazing how fast time goes by. We talked about stuff we did when we were younger. Those were fun times and now we all have settled down and are just happy to be alive. Deborah brought some sushi and Jeff and I ate it for dinner and it was delicious.

Jeff and I hung out and watched TV and relaxed. We watched a lot of swimming. Tess and Nan also watched TV with us. It was nice to sit and relax and just enjoy each others company.

"Wake up!! " says Tess

Today was a long and difficult day for me. We got up early and left at 7:30 a.m. for a 8:15 a.m. appointment. I had an echo ultra sound test and they decided to do a bubble test. Then an EKG. It was a lot of stuff. It turns out that I am still leaking from my atriums. That is not good. On the bright side my right ventricle is getting smaller. Dr. Condon also sent me to get a chest x-ray as there was something not right in the right lung. When he gets x-rays results he will call me. I go to my surgeon, Dr Austin on Thursday and hopefully he can tell me more. I wonder if the leakage is slowing down my recovery.

We didn’t get home until noon today and I was beat. I feel asleep on the couch right away. I was so exhausted. Jeff went to work and I barely remember him leaving. We stopped and got a cheeseburger and milkshake for me for lunch. I was so tired that I only took a couple of bites from my burger and didn’t touch the shake.

About two in the afternoon, Tess was whining (loudly) and pawing at my body. Her extremely loud whining woke me up. I think I was having a nightmare and tossing and turning. Tess has never acted that way before. She was very insistent about waking me up. She has never woke me before and she made sure that I woke up. So I did and then she began to lick my face. I thought she wanted to go potty so I let her out and she stayed next to me.

I got my milkshake and went outside and then tossed a toy for Tess. She was very happy. Nan ran around and barked and had fun. It was nice being in the sun for a few minutes.

I then went back to bed and Tess slept on the floor next to me. Janet came by to drop off Kuro. She has to go to her grandmother’s funeral. Kuro has grown and is turning into a nice dog. Janet took Tess to go and work sheep. Tess was very happy to work for Janet and I think they both had fun. Tess figured out that I was well enough to be by myself. It’s been a while since Tess has worked sheep. Tess came back into the house with her tongue dragging and a smile on her face. Tess has been pretty much by my side for the past three week and she needed a break. It was good seeing Janet and she had the cutest haircut.

After Janet left, I went back to sleep. Tess was whining and licking my face so I let her on the couch. She snuggled next to my feet and would lick my feet and legs and gently put a paw over them. We went to sleep, the two of us, our limbs intertwined. I really enjoyed the closeness that I have with Tess. Nan is slowly getting that way with me. She checks on me and will also stay in the living room with me and Tess. I can tell she gets worried but she is not sure what she can do. She is trying though. When Tess is not on duty, Nan is by my side.

Jeff came home and usually Tess will run to see him. She never left the couch and stayed with me until I got up. I must have not been doing well in her eyes. By her actions, I can tell how I am doing.

I had pasta/beef and green beans for dinner. I had Tess and Nan as my dinner companions and each got a piece after I was done. They were happy.

After dinner I felt much better and I noticed that Tess and Nan decided that I was well enough and left me to hang out in the office. That’s a good sign. I got to watch the Olympics by myself.

I talked to my mom and she was worried about my progress today so she told me that she was coming over tomorrow. I think I will be fine; it was just the long day that I had today that set me back. As it is, I am supposed to go for 4 short walks a day (15-20 minutes) so when I go for several hours to the Dr, that is more than I can handle. Sleep is a great way to recover.

The LaCamas trial is starting and I am bummed that I had to pull out. It is a premier trial with top handlers from all over attending. I had entered Lucy, Nan and Tess. We had been working hard to get into shape. Oh well, we will try for a trial in September.

I have been awake for about six hours and still feel good. The naps must have recharged my batteries. That is good. Before, I would still feel bad and want to go back to sleep. Staying awake for this amount of time and feeling good lets me know that I am recovering as well as knowing that I have turned the corner. I have been home for three weeks and have made good progress and had some setbacks but overall I have been slowly improving.

I asked Dr Condon about my chest and the healing progress. He said that bones take a long time to heal and it would be 6 weeks before I saw a big difference (less pain, etc) He said I will feel tingling and itching for a long while. I have to remember that they opened my chest up twice and they used metal to close me back up. Also my ribs got pulled back to an unnatural position. All of this major work will take time to heal. I guess that I want to be well now so it is hard for me to be patient. But I am learning.

Much better today

This week started off right. I woke up feeling much better and had an appetite. Jeff made me a bowl of strawberries and banana and I gobbled them up quickly. I didn’t wake up at 6ish or so for my ½ pain pill. That’s great news to me. It means the pain has lessened for me. I am not ready to stop the 9:00 pills yet. I am happy that I didn’t have to take the additional pills.

My chest area itches and somewhat hurts but not the full raging chest pain that I had before. I do get a painful twinge now and then but now it doesn’t drop me to my knees. I am still weak as a new borne kitten and am only good for my short daily walks. But I am glad that I can walk about. It has been a few weeks since the surgery but it seems like it was a long time ago.

My memory is still weird as I remember some stuff and not others. I hardly remember being in the hospital. I was pretty drugged up and couldn’t even use the bathroom with out any help. When I ate, the spoon or fork was very hard to use and it was awkward. It was like learning how to use the spoon again. Everything was in slow motion.

Today nothing was in slow motion. I finally recovered from the over extended walks from Friday. My walks today was shorter and I felt good. I made sure that I didn’t over do it.

I lost three pounds since Friday. Today I think I gained some of it back.
My mom came over in the mid morning. As usual, Tess and Nan ran to the front door and greeted her. They escorted her to the kitchen and they got a treat. This is a routine for them.

We had Japanese rice balls for lunch and then some “Flat peaches”. I think that is what they are called. They looked flat. I ate two of them. They had lots of taste and were soft and juicy. Matter of fact, I inhaled them. Mom was surprised to see me eat them so quickly.

For lunch mom made me grilled Dober Sole. She had made that for me the last time she was here. It was delicious last time and just as delicious this time. I ate two large pieces and was happy.

Mom was very happy to see that I was doing better. Last time she saw me in Saturday, I was feeling so bad that I didn’t even move off the couch and had no appetite. Today, I was active and hungry and she was glad to see that.

My brother also called to see how I was doing. He saw me crash on Friday and was concerned. I was happy to talk to him today and he was relived. Last night, when he called I was not well. Today was a good day to talk to him. It’s good to have such a caring family. Mom raised us right. I am glad she is my mom and Nelson is my brother. My mom did a lot of sacrifices for us as kids so we could go to college and be good people.

Mom raised us the “Japanese way”…making sure we had good grades and studying hard. She worked at night so we would not lack for anything. She was very supportive for us. I had my horses and animals and Nelson had his. All she wanted from us was good grades and be respectful. She bought saving bonds for us so we had college funds. She was very happy when Nelson and I went to college and got our degrees. She took care of my brother when he got into a head-on car accident a few years ago and now she is taking care of me. Nelson and I take care of her when she needs help but she is very self sufficient. She walks around Greenlake at a fast clip several times a week. She is truly a wonderful mom.

Of course, what visit would not be complete unless Rigby came around. He came to the front door and mom fed him can of cat food. He gobbled it up and then he went for his nap on mom’s lap. The dogs all were near here the entire time she was here. And they got a treat every time she went into the kitchen. Nan has gotten good where she carefully takes the food from her hand than snatching it.

Most of the day I felt pretty good and was able to go about without my mom’s help. When I get up I am not as wobbly and when I walk I am much steadier. I check my email more often and try to reply. I haven’t been able to reply to all of my email but I try. If you sent me email and I haven’t answered that is why. I am good for a few minutes and then my energy dies down.

We watched the Olympics and enjoyed watching the swim meets. We rooted for Team USA and Japan. My mom knows more of the swimmers and how they fared than me. She is more tuned into the Olympics than me. We had a good time cheering the swimmers on. We decided that Team Volleyball was boring. It is good to watch for a bit then we lost interest. We were hoping they would have Judo or the Horse events.

Mom went home in late afternoon. Tess and Nan stood at the door looking forlorn. They knew she was leaving. We all were sad to see her go.

The rest of the afternoon I watched TV and relaxed. I even took a nap and woke up to see that Tess next to me. Nan was in the dog bed across the room. I was sure they wanted a treat so I gave them a treat. They were happy then.

The rest of the night was good. I didn’t hurt and felt good. Hopefully this will be a pattern. It nice to able to sit and watch TV without pain. Or even go for a walk. I can see why the Doctor said it will take 8 weeks to heal. That’s a lot of healing your body has to do. Not only the heart has to heal but the bones that they cut through have to heal too. That is what takes a long time.

I had some more Dober Sole for dinner. I was starving and wolfed it down. That is good as normally I have to force myself to finish my meal. I was still hungry so Jeff made fruit plate. I am gone from forcing myself to eat to wanting to eat. Having no or less pain helps quite a bit.

I hope tomorrow that I feel just as good as today or better. This long recovery is driving me nuts but I have to do it. It’s well worth it since there was no other choice. Better alive than being dead.